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Dual Career Couples in the News Again
The Huffington Post ran an article by Carolyn Simard on Aug 9 in which she pushed for more recognition of and planning for dual career couples in the high tech industries. She quotes the research by the Clayman Institute (at Stanford University) to say that 82% of technical women are partnered with another person in tech areas, while the comparable number for men is only 37%. This discrepancy suggests that the women are much less likely to be able to rely on a stayathome spouse than the men. Therefore, systems that judge performance by seat time or online email response time or equivalent expectations beyond a 95 job are on average harder on the women.
However,[url=http://nikefreetilbud.hcslnet.com]nike free dame[/url], Simard pointed out that men in a dual career couple can face discrimination because they aren't available 24/7 too. She has heard from men, and I'll quote a long passable about that, "if they leave at 5pm to pick up the kids at the end of the day (just as the pizza delivery arrives for those who will stay at work all evening) they are told they are not "team players"; if they take a paternity leave they are viewed as somehow less committed to their career and fear the impact on their advancement (I heard of one case where a father returning from paternity leave was asked by sneering colleagues if he was "still breastfeeding"). I hear from others that their boss with a stayathome spouse is unsupportive when they have to miss a meeting to take care of a sick child. "
This long quotation makes me think of the earlier post when we discussed the role men might take in opening up STEM fields for women. If these dualtechcouple men point out how unfair this treatment is (which could actually be quoted almost verbatim from treatment of women, of course) how powerful it would be! But women still need to say so too, in my opinion.
Affordable life coaching is a great resource that AWIS provides. I've worked with two of them and find them to be exceptional at what they do. I "treat" myself to two coaching sessions a year and they are always helpful, although since I"ve done it for so many years now, it's much more effective for me than for people just starting out to have so few sessions per year. Most people generally need 610 to get started and then "maintenance" at once quarterly. If I could afford it I would do it more often :)
I agree, it's easy to forget what our values are when we're under a lot of pressure. Easier said than done when everyone around you is telling you should want "X" instead.